Monday, May 23, 2011

Castor: Forever Loved- March 29, 1999-May 22, 2011

Where to start?  It's had to describe anything that's been a part of one's life for nearly half of it... even harder when that "thing" was a living being whom you loved.
  Castor was born as one of seven kittens to a mother owned by a couple other college kids in the town my university is located.  He and Pollux were the only two Siamese looking kittens in the entire litter.  We wanted named that wold reflect their twin-like appearance and ran through several, rejecting the most obvious ones like "Cain and Abel," "Romulus and Remus," and "Heckle and Jeckle."  I came up with the idea of Castor and Pollux.

From Wikipedia:
"In the myth the twins shared the same mother but had different fathers which meant that Pollux was immortal and Castor was mortal. When Castor died, Pollux asked Zeus to let him share his own immortality with his twin to keep them together and they were transformed into the Gemini constellation. The pair were regarded as the patrons of sailors, to whom they appeared as St. Elmo's fire."

 It took a while to figure out which was which, but their personalities helped make the distinction.  Spookily enough the mythological Pollux also outlived his brother.  That thought has been haunting me for about a year now...

Castor wasn't the runt of the litter but he was the smaller of the two.  I started referring to him as "my littlest love."  It stuck even when he became the bigger of them.  Even after baby Confetti came into our lives.  He loved playing fetch with paper wads, eating canned pasta (I didn't start him on that), and being outside on walks.  And people.  Being a university student I had friends coming and going almost every day.  Castor loved everyone and just knew they were there to see him.

Saturday morning everything was as normal as it had been for weeks.  Then right as the vet's office closed, Castor took a turn for the worse.  FH and I debated and decided we would wait and see if he was really in pain or if he might be able to wait until Monday morning.  He seemed fine through Saturday evening but Sunday morning was a different story.

He was so tired and couldn't walk on his own any longer.  Thankfully our vet works for the emergency clinic, so they were willing to work with us and our special needs.  FH and I decided (with our vet) months ago that we wanted a necropsy preformed so we'd be better prepared if Pollux starts showing these signs.  Usually the emergency clinic doesn't hold bodies for testing, but after a couple of phone calls the arrangements were made.

Everyone got to say good-bye here at home.  Castor loved on Artie like always.  Pollux has been increasingly upset for the last few days and didn't want to have much to do with his brother.  They did touch noses one last time though.

It was bittersweet letting him go.  Stopping the pain outweighed our own sadness though.  Castor was relaxed the whole time, from the car ride to the end.  In fact I'll swear to my dying day that he looked relieved.

Pollux and Artie are both sad and confused.  I'm hoping Artie can keep Pollux from slipping into a depressed funk.  Tempie hasn't noticed Castor's absence yet but she will eventually.  As for me, I'm stuck between relief that he's not hurting and being totally shattered that my baby's gone.  We've been preparing for this day since before moving to this house last year.  In fact we weren't sure he'd see his 12th birthday, but he fought hard to stay with us.

I believe he's earned the rest.  I know he's basking in the sun at the Rainbow Bridge with Confetti, 'Bert, and their Uncle Meat Loaf.  I'll see them all again eventually.
Good-bye, Castor, my littlest love. I will love you forever. See you at the Rainbow Bridge.


Michelle said...

I am so, so sorry that you've had to say good-bye....

Lirael said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. Even though you knew it was going to happen, it still hurts. A big hug for you and Pollux!

Rachel said...

Oh Kat love im so sorry you have lost your fur baby it hurts us so much but we love them all the same letting them go is really not easy just think of the good memories and hold on to those he isnt in pain any more and he knows how much you love him
take care sweetie big big hugs

The Mini - Maker said...

I'm in tears... I'm so sorry for your loss, Kat. Castor obviously holds a special place in your heart, and I can't imagine having to make that choice. Praying for you and Dave, and your other babies for the adjustment and comfort. If you need anything, let me know.


Caseymini said...

Kat, what a beautiful tribute to a beautiful cat. I am sorry for your loss. I hope that Pollux and Artie will comfort each other now.I will miss seeing Castor on your blog.

Debie Lyons said...

(((((((((((((((( Hugs ))))))))))

oOooooooooober luffies to you and FH.

Debie xxxxxxxxx

Debie Lyons said...

(((((((((((((((( Hugs ))))))))))

oOooooooooober luffies to you and FH.

Debie xxxxxxxxx

Lataina said...

So sorry for your loss, Kat =(

Katie said...

Oh Kat! I've got big 'ole crocodile tears rolling down my face! What a hard thing to do... But You know it was what was best for him! I wish I could be there to give you a big hug!

Karin F. said...

what a sad but truly beautiful post! I'm so sorry for your loss. Bare in mind that 12 yrs is a decent age to live to and he was loved.
big hugs

Kathi said...

Such a sweet story about your precious Castor. There are going to be so many happy faces and cuddles at Rainbow Bridge.
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.

A. Wright said...

Big Hugs to you all. Hope you are feeling just a little better each day. Feel free to email me if you just need to vent

Kim said...

Oh Kat. I'm so sorry- I'm crying right now and I never even met Castor in person. What a wonderful post you have written about him. I wish I could give you a big hug in person. Rest in Peace and only sunny days at Rainbow Bridge sweet Castor ♥

Leigh said...

On no! I am so, so sad to hear this news and so very sorry. I know Rascal was waiting for Castor at the Rainbow Bridge, and delighted to make his acquaintance.

Anna said...

I'm so sad for you. (I cried, a lot, reading your post.) I remember the first time I saw a picture of your little Castor is when I saw him in the sweater you made him, because I made one just like it for my kitty Flake. =( I have 3 kitties that are 10 years old (and 3 that are quite a bit younger), and if I'm this distraught about your loss I don't know how I'll cope when it's time for my babies to pass on in just a few short years. I'm sure your kitty is very happy wherever he is. It's unfair that we love our kitties as much as we love the rest of our family members, but we don't get to be with them for long enough.

Plushpussycat said...

I'm so sorry for your loss but so glad I found your blog today! Hang in there! It does get better.

Miss Kitty said...

I'm SO sorry to hear about your sweet Castor...ohhh, this is so sad. (And so sorry I'm just now checking your blog, durp.)

I lost my oldest-bestest kitty Graya (14.5 yrs old) last July after a long illness, so I empathize. Hang in there. So very sorry for your loss. Castor had a wonderful family and was cared for all his life...thank you for being a good hoomin. Hugs to you and Pollux. (((hugs)))